How To Care For Yourself When Someone Insists On ‘Being Right’

Hello Connectors,

Welcome to The Connection Current!!

This month, we’re exploring a quiet but powerful form of resilience - how to care for yourself when someone insists on being right.

It’s a moment we all face—when dialogue turns into a debate, and curiosity gives way to control. But what if the real leadership move isn’t to push back harder, but to step back smarter?

Inside:

  • Why emotional safety matters more than being right

  • How to stay centred when conversations get rigid

  • A self-leadership lens for navigating tension

  • What we gain when we choose connection over correction

Let’s shift the focus from proving to understanding.

Less ego. More empathy. The quiet strength of self-awareness.

📰 When Being Right Becomes a Barrier: How to Stay Grounded

In high-pressure environments, the need to be right can feel like survival. But when someone digs in, it’s often a sign of deeper discomfort—not a personal attack.

So how do you protect your energy and stay true to your values?

🧠 What’s Beneath the Surface?

Control is often a cover for fear

  • People may cling to certainty when they feel vulnerable or unseen.

  • Sometimes they just don’t know how to do it differently.

You don’t have to match their intensity

  • Calm is contagious. Your presence can shift the tone.

Your nervous system deserves care

  • Emotional regulation is a leadership skill—not a luxury.

🧘 Self-Leadership Practices for Tough Moments

  1. Pause and name your experience
    “I’m noticing tension in my body—I need a moment to breathe.”

  2. Set boundaries with compassion
    “I want to continue this conversation, but the way we are debating, or being attached to a certain way of thinking is not working for me...”

  3. Use the NVC lens to reflect inwardly
    Observation: What did I hear or see?
    Feeling: What am I feeling right now?
    Need: What need is alive in me?
    Request: What can I do to support myself?

💬 Choices: 

Reframe choices:

  • Call a pause in the conversation

  • Express what’s going on for you: When I hear you restate the same opinion 3 times, and there is no pause for discussion when I say something different, (observation) I begin to feel anxious, (feeling),  I lose trust that I can be heard for what’s important to me. I would like both of our opinions to matter, and for us to tease out what is important from both perspectives which can inform our decision. (needs). Would you be willing to tell me what you are hearing really matters in how we are having this conversation? (request).

  • Offer empathy: Is it really important to you that we don’t make mistakes, that we get the best outcomes possible? 

This isn’t avoidance—it’s emotional integrity.

🌟 What We Gain When We Choose Self-Care Over Self-Defense

  • Clarity in communication

  • Emotional resilience

  • Space for authentic connection

  • A deeper sense of self-trust

Sometimes, the most impactful response is to say state the impasse or to call a break.

🔗 Let’s Reflect

Have you ever felt drained by someone’s need to be right?

What helped you stay grounded or shift the dynamic?

👇 Share your story in the comments.

#SelfLeadership #EmotionalIntelligence #Boundaries #NonviolentCommunication #Resilience #EmpathyInAction #RestorativePractices #ConnectionOverCorrection

Warm regards,
Pam Orbach
Founder
A Center For Restorative Solutions

Pam OrbachComment